No one takes their job more seriously than John Harbaugh. He’s an absolute cover MACHINE in the preseason. 16-1-1 ATS. He’s the human embodiment of a statistical anomaly, and I have no choice but to respect him. Normally when people get to a point in their job where literally nothing they do matters, they just download some bullshit game like Bloons Tower Defense 5, and dick off. John Harbaugh is just built different. If he had an office job, he’d come in on December 26th and literally never leave until January 3rd. HE’S. BUILT. DIFFERENT.
Unfortunately that doesn’t matter today.
Patriots @ Eagles U 38 (Pats U 20)
The Patriots are going to contribute absolutely nothing to the total for this game. The Eagles’ D has been blanketing Patriots receivers all week at the joint practices, and I have no doubt that that’ll continue on all levels tonight.
Then you get Nick Mullens playing in the second half for the Eagles, and he’ll just munch on a big bag of dicks for 30 minutes. Just put a jugs machine on a kid in an electric wheel chair and you’ll have better results.
Don’t think about it. Don’t even watch it. Turn your TV off. Throw away the power cord. Burn your house down. Move to Antigua, but still bet the under, because that’s easy.
Go Birds.